Reality is not exactly my cup of tea. Don't get me wrong, I'm extremely pragmatic in many ways but if there is any wiggle room in a situation I will put my head in the sand for as long as I can. Pragmatism is how I deal with the reality life keeps dumping on my doorstep. Denial is how I manage the rest.
After years of unhealthy living, okay....I admit, often downright physically abusive living, my body has chosen to fight back. Damn it. I have so many vices and I love them all. Certainly my vices get more attention in my life than anything else, so they must be my babies. Sure, I'm a bossy do-gooder with great advice for everyone else to follow but when it comes to my own private life, I'm all about the sin. Hallelujah.
So let's review what I'm currently denied by mother nature. Coffee. Cigarettes. Fast Food. Reading. Drinking to excess. Staying up past 11:00 pm. Remembering the words. It's not fair, I tell you. It just isn't fair!
I hate exercise, decaffeinated tea and having to light incense in the hope that some of the smoke goes up my nose.
All of that with the knowledge that if I indulge in more than two drinks in an evening I'll suffer immeasurably for days. Bother.
I was in this crabby state of mind when Stacie called on her way to work. The sound of her voice made my decaf tea taste so much more appealing. Especially when she told me that Millie is currently fascinated with Dog the Bounty Hunter. If you don't know who Dog the Bounty Hunter is, you have not been watching enough cable TV.
Millie announced to Stacie this morning that she wants to be Beth, Dog's wife, for Halloween this year. If that wasn't funny enough, Stacie's response to that idea (when dishing with me, she didn't say it to the child) was the cherry on top.
That's why I have decaf Bigelow tea all over my kitchen cabinets right now. The whole thing had us howling especially because at the age of 8, Millie is currently trying to decide between having a career in dentistry or bounty hunting.
There are only two things I know for sure. First, Millie is bossy enough to tackle a career in either field and two, she better enjoy coffee and cigarettes now while she still can.
I'm going to go cuddle my signed photo of the Marlboro man and weep into an empty coffee tin.
Yours,
Miss Pierce
After years of unhealthy living, okay....I admit, often downright physically abusive living, my body has chosen to fight back. Damn it. I have so many vices and I love them all. Certainly my vices get more attention in my life than anything else, so they must be my babies. Sure, I'm a bossy do-gooder with great advice for everyone else to follow but when it comes to my own private life, I'm all about the sin. Hallelujah.
So let's review what I'm currently denied by mother nature. Coffee. Cigarettes. Fast Food. Reading. Drinking to excess. Staying up past 11:00 pm. Remembering the words. It's not fair, I tell you. It just isn't fair!
I hate exercise, decaffeinated tea and having to light incense in the hope that some of the smoke goes up my nose.
I was in this crabby state of mind when Stacie called on her way to work. The sound of her voice made my decaf tea taste so much more appealing. Especially when she told me that Millie is currently fascinated with Dog the Bounty Hunter. If you don't know who Dog the Bounty Hunter is, you have not been watching enough cable TV.
 |
| He wrote a book! |
"Don't worry honey. You'll be her soon enough."
That's why I have decaf Bigelow tea all over my kitchen cabinets right now. The whole thing had us howling especially because at the age of 8, Millie is currently trying to decide between having a career in dentistry or bounty hunting.
There are only two things I know for sure. First, Millie is bossy enough to tackle a career in either field and two, she better enjoy coffee and cigarettes now while she still can.
By the way, the person who first sang this song to me? Millie.
I'm going to go cuddle my signed photo of the Marlboro man and weep into an empty coffee tin.
Yours,
Miss Pierce